2025 Was the Toughest Year of My Life

I recorded this update on New Year’s Day after trying many times to get through it. I had hoped to share it on New Year’s Eve, but talking about 2025 was harder than I expected. Losing my father was the hardest part of the toughest year of my life.

I’ve experienced a lot of loss over the years, including people I was still close to and stayed in touch with. But none of that prepared me for losing a parent. My father passed away the day before Thanksgiving, and a little over a month later, I was still trying to process that he was no longer here.

The promises I made to my dad

My dad didn’t want to pass away in a hospital. When he had to be hospitalized near the end of his life, he wanted to come home. I was able to bring him home and keep that promise.

I had also promised that he wouldn’t be alone. Family came to visit and spent time with him. For three and a half days, I sat beside him, holding his hand and sleeping very little. Near the end, one of my nieces joined me. We were both holding his hands when he took his last breath.

Being there was the hardest thing I’ve ever done. I’m grateful I could keep those promises, even while I’m still finding words for what that time meant.

Why I’ve been away from the channel

In May 2024, I moved into my parents’ home to help care for both of them, especially my father as his health declined. That responsibility became the center of my life for nearly two years. It explains much of the distance between the regular uploads I used to make and the long breaks that followed.

Caregiving was difficult, but I’m glad I had that time with him. My dad always supported what I did, including making videos. He took part in some of them himself. My first attempt at a podcast included my mom and dad, and in 2018 I took my parents on a road trip to San Francisco and back. He enjoyed the trip and being involved in the videos.

At the time I recorded this update, I hadn’t been able to watch those videos again since his passing. I hoped I would be able to. Having those moments recorded matters to me, even when revisiting them is still too painful.

I also created a memorial video honoring my father, with custom songs telling the story of his life. If you didn’t know him, that tribute is one way to get to know him through what I wanted to share.

Making room to create again

I still want to create, travel, and pursue the experiences that matter to me. During 2025, I managed two cruises and a trip to Las Vegas, and I filmed those trips. With everything happening at home, editing and releasing the footage didn’t feel right at the time.

In this update, I shared my intention to release that travel work through Travel with Melvin. I also talked about the separate spaces for my other interests: reactions, photography, puzzles, paranormal investigations, and Houston Food Fanatics with my brother. Those were plans I was discussing as the new year began, rather than a promise that I could immediately return to a full schedule.

Making this video was a way to explain where I’d been, but it was also a way to talk about the loss itself. I’m still working through it. For anyone experiencing the loss of someone they love, I wanted to share that difficult place honestly, without pretending I had already moved past it.

My dad was a wonderful father and role model. I miss him tremendously. I hope the way I live and the things I create can have some of the same positive impact he had on the people around him.